The Dolphin Personality

Portrait of a Dolphin Personality

Scientific Name

Tursiops truncatus

Collective Term

A pod of dolphins

Dolphins are those tanned, fit, beautiful people who populate the background scenes of Baywatch. They are annoyingly healthy; eating and drinking with abandon and never becoming overweight.

Undoubtedly it's their active lifestyles that keep them so trim, but their good genes have something to do with it too. Even though dolphins subsist on junk food, their hair is shiny and their skin always glossy.

Street Smart but Arguably Unwise

Though their large brain is capable of solving almost any problem, the dolphin's reputation for intelligence is overrated. They place little value in cerebral pursuits and avoid mental challenges. Dolphins are nonetheless able to hold their own in debates, they simply prefer cavorting and surfing to discussing weighty philosophical issues.

Dolphins expect nothing from life other than time to enjoy it. As highly sexual individuals they spend a great deal of time in the pursuit of bodily pleasure, and their aggressive quest for sex sometimes dominates social interactions.

The Dolphin's Career

Dolphins were not designed for manual labor. Their bodies lack the skillful hands of the land mammal personalities, but their intelligence and social abilities give them advantages in people-oriented careers.

Rarely found in nine-to-five office jobs, their outgoing personality makes the dolphin a capable public relations representative or outside salesperson. Other recommended careers include professional sports figure, fitness instructor and actor.

A natural sonar gives dolphins the ability to accurately read the hidden intentions of others by picking up their subtle body language. This talent makes them ideal psychologists or crime investigators.

Dolphins in the Wild

Dolphins live in schools containing males and females of all ages. There does not appear to be any particular leader, but males do observe a hierarchical structure on size. Dolphins are highly social animals and will assist an injured member of the school, raising it to the surface to breathe. This behavior has been reported by injured swimmers who have been helped to safety by these gregarious creatures.

Dolphins have an insulating layer of blubber, but because they have no sweat glands and are unable to pant, they must dispel their excess heat through their tail flukes and flippers. This is why these parts of their bodies are warmer to the touch. It is believed that dolphins have little or no sense of smell, although their excellent hearing ability and built-in sonar more than compensate for this deficiency.

Famous Dolphin Personalities

Cameron Diaz

Lithe. Wet. Sleek. Playful. Nothing else to say.

Burt Reynolds

Burt Reynolds in his later years became a parody of a dolphin. Self-absorbed perhaps, but always on the look-out for fun times.

Dan Marino

Yeah. Dan Marino was the Dolphin's most famous quarterback, but he was also athletic, smart and unpredictably agile.

Careers & Hobbies

  • Public relations

  • Sales

  • Pro sports

  • Fitness instructor

  • Boating

  • Skiing

  • Swimming

  • Partying

  • Surfing

  • Practical jokes

Best Mates for a Dolphin

Dolphins are a decidedly lusty lot and never consider the consequences of their behavior before plunging into relationships. A high level of self-esteem gives them the confidence that things will turn out well and they usually do . . . for the dolphin that is. It’s usually the dolphin that brings a relationship to its end, and it's the same reason every time: there's simply too many fish in the sea. No hard feelings of course, it's just time to move on to sample more of life's delicious bouquet.

Saying no to a sexual invitation simply never occurs to a dolphin. It's not that they're indiscriminate or anything, but they have a deep respect for chutzpah and wouldn't want to snub anyone with the gumption to put him or herself on the line.

Because of their adaptable personalities, dolphins have a large pool of compatible partners from which to choose. While the ocean-going otter and sea lion are eminently suitable for their spontaneous lifestyles, some of the larger animal personalities can also make for exciting companions. In particular, the water-loving tiger provides the challenging melodrama that the dolphin craves.

Friendship

Goes deep

Love

Forever interesting

Sex

Right up your alley

Friendship

Play down at the river together

Love

An interesting pair

Sex

A joyful romp

Friendship

An intense friendship

Love

Glorious

Sex

A dream date

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