The Walrus Personality
Walrus Characteristics: Large • Methodical • Happy-go-lucky • Loyal • Complacent • Lazy
Scientific Name: Odobenus rosmarus
Collective Term: A suet of walrus
The Walrus' Defining Characteristics
These apparently benign individuals are usually easy to recognize. When you think of walruses, think of those large people sunning their perfectly rounded bellies at the beach. Or just think of Wilford Brimley. Either way, the walrus is that ruddy uncle at the family reunion who dispenses charm and off-color jokes like donuts.
Ahh, donuts! Walruses have an unrelenting sweet tooth and a weakness for home cooking, and though they might seem comfortable with their roly-poly physiques one shouldn't overdo the teasing. Underneath that thick skin is a surprisingly sensitive spirit. But still, it's difficult to embarrass a walrus. Nothing in life is taken so seriously that it cannot be laughed at, and its infectious love for life contaminates everyone who has unprotected encounters with this hearty beast.
Walruses are not to be trifled with however, and as good-natured as they appear they can be cantankerous and aggressive when slighted. Mostly however, their bark is worse than their bite and their big-hearted natures soon reassert themselves.
The Walrus' Social Approach
Although accustomed to large groups of people, the walrus is self-contained and respects the privacy of others. It is happiest when surrounded by the comforts of home and feels little need to travel far afield.
Although walruses perceive work to be a complete waste of time, they are methodical and consistent employees and perform best in jobs demanding reliability and an understanding of the big picture. They function poorly under deadlines and prefer careers that enable them to work at your own pace, particularly as engineers, government workers, food inspectors or managers.
Walruses in the Wild
Walruses congregate in groups of about a hundred individuals, living primarily in coastal waters and basking on rocks or ice floes. Characterized by their ponderous, blubbery bodies, large tusks, and tough reddish brown skin, these magnificent animals are largely protected from man and flourish in the Arctic Circle.
Their tusks are actually elongated canine teeth and serve many functions including defense, clam digging and as an aid in pulling their ponderous bulk from the water. Their family name Odobenidae means "walks with teeth."
On land, walruses are able to travel faster than a man can run, and with their formidable bulk and dangerous tusks, these seemingly lazy creatures have earned a great deal of respect from hunters.
Careers & Hobbies
Food inspector • Store manager • Government worker • Actor
Watching TV • Babysitting • Dinner parties • Card games
Love & Friendship
Walruses don't shower their lovers with gifts but communicate their feelings with demonstrative hugs and sloppy kisses instead. Their biggest asset is a hearty laugh; a generous, deep-bellied guffaw that can disarm even the most cynical. And, with such an engaging disposition it's easy to see why walruses are so effective in their social lives.
In the bedroom, the assessment is not quite so encouraging. With their belief that affection can substitute for physical contact, walruses tend to be lazy and indifferent to their partners' sexual needs. A walrus's mate never has to complain about the lack of physical proof of its love, for it is as demonstrative as a creature can be. Just because it won't take you on a romantic getaway doesn't mean it isn't madly in love, and if it fails to give you a box of chocolates on Valentine's Day, it's probably because it ate them first.
As a mammalian personality -- comfortable on land and sea -- walruses can select their mates from the ranks of the aquatic and terrestrial creatures, but must avoid partners chosen from the feline family whose edgy, unsettled lifestyles dramatically conflict with the walruses' torpid disposition.
Its most compatible partner, the hippo, makes a wonderfully devoted counterpart for its matching Epicurean appetites. These two love nothing better than indulging in a grape-filled evening in the luscious embrace of the couch.
Famous Walrus Personalities
Prince Philip, Duke Of Edinburgh
Gruff, commanding, and unapologetically blunt to the end.
Notorious for the kind of blunt, unfiltered remarks that left diplomatic staff wincing and the public simultaneously scandalized and entertained, Prince Philip embodied the walrus's core identity: a massive, commanding presence that operates entirely on its own terms and offers no apologies for doing so. His decades of famously candid gaffes — telling a group of British students in China they'd become "slitty-eyed" if they stayed too long, or asking an Indigenous Australian whether they still threw spears — weren't lapses in judgment so much as the natural expression of a bull walrus who recognizes no authority above his own instincts. Like the walrus, he held his territory with gruff, immovable certainty for over seven decades as consort, enduring the role on his own bristling, unyielding terms. The walrus doesn't charm — it dominates by sheer force of presence, and neither did he.
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Wilford Brimley
A gruff, commanding presence with unmistakable physical gravitas.
With his thunderous baritone, imposing physical frame, and an air of absolute authority that could silence a room without a single word, Wilford Brimley embodied every quality the walrus represents in the Animal In You system. His iconic diabetes awareness campaigns, delivered with the stern, no-nonsense directness of a man who simply would not be ignored, mirrored the walrus's role as a dominant elder whose word carries unquestioned weight within the group. His gruff portrayal in *The Natural* and *Cocoon* reinforced that same immovable, patriarch-like presence — powerful yet oddly reassuring, commanding respect rather than demanding it. Like the walrus, who rules its territory through sheer physical gravitas and an authoritative bellow rather than aggression, Brimley projected a protective, deeply territorial energy that made him one of Hollywood's most unforgettable character anchors.
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Robert Morley
Rotund, witty grand presence commanding rooms with ancient authority.
With a magnificent girth, a thunderous baritone, and an eyebrow raised in perpetual aristocratic disdain, this celebrated British character actor embodied the walrus archetype so completely it seems nature designed him for the role. His turn as the imperious Oscar Wilde in the 1960 film *Oscar Wilde* showcased his gift for commanding absolute attention simply by occupying space, much as the walrus dominates its rocky shore through sheer mass and unhurried authority. His famously caustic wit — delivered with leisurely precision in countless television appearances and interviews — mirrors the walrus's unhurried, ancient confidence, a creature that need not rush because nothing dares challenge it. Morley's very presence communicated that the world should slow down and accommodate him, an attitude the walrus perfected long before humanity arrived.
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Barry White
A magnificent, deep-voiced giant who ruled through sheer presence.
Barry White was a massively built, deeply sensual, and commanding presence whose legendary bass voice and slow, luxurious style defined romantic soul music for decades. Like the walrus, he was large, unhurried, and impossibly charismatic — dominating his territory through sheer gravitational force rather than aggression or cunning. His persona was warm, indulgent, and full of earthy pleasure, never threatening but utterly impossible to ignore.
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