Badger + Mountain Goat

Rocky Terrain, Rockier Relationship

The badger barrels through life like a wrecking ball with opinions, while the mountain goat serenely picks its way up impossible peaks alone — and therein lies the problem. These two can share a beer and a grudging mutual respect, but romantically it's a disaster waiting to happen: one needs to dominate every room, the other literally climbs mountains to get away from people like that. In bed, there's enough primal energy to start a small fire, but not enough emotional chemistry to keep it burning. Think of it as a great one-night stand followed by a very awkward silence that lasts the rest of your lives.

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