Bison + Eagle

Great Friends, Terrible Lovers, Adequate Everything Else

The bison and eagle make a surprisingly solid friendship — one brings the stubborn groundedness, the other brings the sweeping vision, and somehow it works over beers. Romantically, though, this is a disaster waiting to happen: the bison wants roots, routine, and someone who comes home for dinner, while the eagle is already circling a different zip code. In bed, there's enough primal energy to generate some heat, but the eagle's emotional altitude and the bison's earthbound expectations will eventually leave both parties staring at the ceiling. Keep this one in the friend zone — it's the only zone where neither of them gets trampled.

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