Dog + Warthog

Best Friends, Terrible Lovers, Disastrous Bedmates

The Dog and Warthog are the kind of duo who can talk all night, split a bar tab, and still be texting each other at 2am — purely as friends. The Dog's warm, people-pleasing loyalty finds a genuine match in the Warthog's blunt, no-nonsense authenticity; neither has to perform for the other. But romance? The Dog wants a soulmate and the Warthog wants... not that. And in the bedroom, the Dog's eager-to-please enthusiasm collides so badly with the Warthog's gruff indifference that it's less chemistry and more a very awkward nature documentary. Keep this one in the friend zone — it's the only zone that actually works.

Try Another Match