Mountain Goat + Sea Lion

One Climbs Mountains, One Claps for Fish

The mountain goat's stoic, self-reliant scramble up life's sheer cliffs doesn't exactly pair well with the sea lion's crowd-pleasing, look-at-me energy. As friends, they can manage — the goat tolerates the sea lion's antics, and the sea lion occasionally drags the goat off its lonely ledge for a good time. Romantically, it's a persistent negotiation between solitude and spectacle that exhausts both parties more than it rewards them. And in the bedroom? Let's just say one wants a soulful connection and the other needs an audience, which is a problem when there are only two of you.

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