Porcupine + Zebra

Spiky Meets Stripy: Someone's Getting Hurt

The porcupine's prickly, stay-back energy is about as compatible with the zebra's herd-loving, look-at-me social magnetism as a cactus is with a bouncy castle. The zebra wants to gallop across the savanna with a crowd of admirers; the porcupine wants everyone to please, for the love of god, take three steps back. As friends, they can occasionally appreciate each other from a safe distance — zebra providing the fun, porcupine providing the reality check nobody asked for. Romantically and sexually, however, this pairing has 'frustrating misfire' written all over it, and not the fun kind.

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